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and i still don't know exactly who i am, i never will, amen.

she whispers something in my ear, the message is unclear, she motions outside.

This journal may contain adult concepts.

Created on 2009-03-30 17:30:50 (#19315878), last updated 2009-10-29

22 comments received, 415 comments posted

23 Journal Entries, 1 Tag, 6 Memories, 0 Virtual Gifts, 13 Userpics

Basic Info
Name:you'vegotfakewrittenalloveryouininvisibleink.
Birthdate:1990-01-07
Bio
i'm still frustrated from last night,
things happened in half-time, i'm sick of the bends.
my panic research was no help,

i sink into myself,
afraid of the fall that never ends.
i wait, but i'm too tired to play pretend,
i'll suffocate until the end.

no time for halfhearted goodbyes,
i turn on the spotlight, and flee from the scene.
cheap flights from paris to bangkok, i thought it was nonstop,
can't sleep on the klm again.
i haunt the halls of medicine at night,
choking back the urge to fight.

her cat was clawing the floorboards, just outside of our door,
the panic begins.
i searched the whole damn apartment, from ceiling to carpet,
no sign of the things she used to own.
as autumn turns its back on me again,
i climb the walls for oxygen.

my body aches, it heaves, it shakes,
all somersaults through so-called art,
and i still don't know exactly who i am,
i never will, amen.

she whispers something in my ear, the message is unclear,
she motions outside.
i trail her closely from behind,
she tries hard not to cry,
she shakes underneath the pouring rain...

"i can't compete with all your damn ideas,
this isn't working out for you or me.
the truth is I'm too tired to play pretend,
this is goodbye, this is the end."



about me;


I don't know myself.

I'm an odd one, as far as I know. I find stupid things funny and freak out over nothing at all. I love concerts, music, writing, photoshop, photography, reading, and many other things. If you want to add me, and you don't comment on my 'friends only' entry, I probably won't add you back. Why? Because I don't like adding to someone's friend count when they don't want to talk to me.

If I have you added, I kind of suck at talking on LJ. So you can PM me and ask me for my myspace / facebook / MSN / AIM, and I'll most likely give it to you.

Yeah. I felt a new about me was needed, but hadn't a clue as to what to say in it.
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Interests (77):

11:11, actually good music, bandom, batman, batman begins, being fat, billy talent, bob bryar, books, bring me the horizon, chapstick, cillian murphy, coke, dance of the dead, dawn of the dead, drive by, extras, fanfic, fanfiction, frank iero, frank/mikey, frikey, gerard way, gerard/bob, gerard/mikey, halifax, harry potter, haste the day, hawk nelson, i hate frerard, joker, kill hannah, knowledge, kurt cobain, left 4 dead, loving my body, ludo, luna lovegood, mcr slash, mikey way, msi, my chemical romance, nightmare of you, nirvana, not caring about weight, not shitty music, pepsi, photoshop, photoshop cs4, poladroid, pretties, ray toro, rise against, sara bareilles, scarecrow, senses fail, serial killers, shaun of the dead, single file, slash, slut free, smut, soda, specials, stephen king, the dark knight, the joker, the matches, the morning light, uglies, valencia, waycest, werewolves, writing, yelling, zombie movies, zombies
Friends [View Entries]

Friends (14):

aceles, blck_cherry, boring_naj, chemical_pulse, disgorge, earth_to_morgue, janto_faghag, lexxxxxii, magic_electric, mformikey, milou_veronica, squeaks_sk, tadxbitxlate, x_keepthefaith

Friend of (15):

boring_naj, chemical_pulse, disgorge, earth_to_morgue, edgarandehran, glittersnifferx, janto_faghag, kasperjonasx3, lexxxxxii, magic_electric, mformikey, sailinggrey, squeaks_sk, tawnitheterible, x_keepthefaith
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Watching (141):

2amtomorning, _____mcr_icons, __mcr, _shaunfan, a_softerworld, acelesisgerard, alittleawkward, anamia_drama, anorexia_icons, appleleaf, arkham_slash, bad_everything, bad_hair, bad_piercings, bad_surgery, badmakeup, badmakeuptheme, bandfandom_ref, bandom_podfic, bandom_recs, bandomkinkmeme, bandslashsecret, banned_icons, batfic, batmanholyland, better_mcrslash, bob_exists, bob_slash, brokenbride, capslock_mcr, chemical_spork, chemicalromance, cillianicons, clandestinefic, craigslistlulz, cranekinkmeme, crowxcrane, customers_suck, cuttingimage, dearmikey, dot_trans_snark, efagz, fake_lj_deaths, fake_ljers, flamerz_lol, fontaddicts, franklovesmikey, fuckyou_batman, fuckyou_mcr, fullsizeiero, garry_way, geeheartmikey, geekyink, gerard_bob, getoffmyspace, godrichollow, gotham_fiction, herbal_t, hp_cestfest, i_am_pansexual, internet_fakes, kissmyass_cosmo, kittenfarts, knivesandlint, late_night_lie, lj_maintenance, ljsecret, lol_anaz, lol_teenz, lolcreeps, lower_gauge, luv_my_music, madradpiercings, mcr_crack_fic, mcr_hardcore, mcr_het_fics, mcr_icons, mcr_layouts, mcr_macros, mcr_pic_spam, mcr_prompt_fics, mcrficbetas, mcrficfinder, mcrphotographs, mcrsecrets, mcrslashfics, mcrumorcontrol, mcshearts, morbid_oddities, music_is_best, my_chemical_fic, my_slashromance, myadultromance, mychem_fic_req, mychemicalau, mychemicalmedia, mychemicalslash, news, ontd_hp, ontdhp, ontdslytherin, petepatrick, peterick, plainlovely, premade_ljs, queer_rage, refuted, safehavenslash, schechterxcore, senses_fail, shitty_mods, slowbirds, socialxscene, stfu_badmakeup, stfugerard, stupid_faces, stupid_free, stupid_ljsecret, thefrictionzone, thismakesmemad, totteringly, tranny_rage, trans_rage, transgender, transgenderkids, tumblrs, two_way_street, u_make_lj_suck, useless_facts, vegetarian, waycest100, waycestislove, weasleycest, weheartquotes, whatever_stuff, wrongworddammit, wtf27, xgeliophobiax, xwhysoseriousx, yahoo_lulz, zombie_tparty

Member of (131):

24_7_posting, 2amtomorning, _____mcr_icons, __mcr, _shaunfan, a_softerworld, acelesisgerard, alittleawkward, anamia_drama, anorexia_icons, appleleaf, arkham_slash, bad_everything, bad_hair, bad_piercings, bad_surgery, badmakeup, bandfandom_ref, bandom_podfic, bandom_recs, bandomkinkmeme, bandslashsecret, banned_icons, batfic, batmanholyland, better_mcrslash, bob_exists, bob_slash, brokenbride, capslock_mcr, chemicalromance, cillianicons, clandestinefic, craigslistlulz, cranekinkmeme, crowxcrane, customers_suck, cuttingimage, dear_you, dearmikey, efagz, fake_lj_deaths, flamerz_lol, fontaddicts, franklovesmikey, fuckyou_batman, fuckyou_mcr, fullsizeiero, garry_way, geeheartmikey, geekyink, gerard_bob, getoffmyspace, godrichollow, gotham_fiction, herbal_t, hp_cestfest, i_am_pansexual, internet_fakes, kissmyass_cosmo, kittenfarts, knivesandlint, late_night_lie, lol_anaz, lol_teenz, lolcreeps, lower_gauge, luv_my_music, madradpiercings, mcr_crack_fic, mcr_hardcore, mcr_het_fics, mcr_icons, mcr_layouts, mcr_macros, mcr_pic_spam, mcr_prompt_fics, mcrficbetas, mcrficfinder, mcrgen, mcrphotographs, mcrslashfics, mcrumorcontrol, mcshearts, morbid_oddities, music_is_best, my_chemical_fic, my_slashromance, myadultromance, mychem_fic_req, mychemicalau, mychemicalmedia, mychemicalslash, ontd_hp, ontdhp, ontdslytherin, petepatrick, peterick, plainlovely, premade_ljs, refuted, safehavenslash, schechterxcore, senses_fail, shitty_mods, slowbirds, socialxscene, stfu_badmakeup, stfugerard, stupid_faces, stupid_free, stupid_ljsecret, thismakesmemad, totteringly, transgender, transgenderkids, tumblrs, two_way_street, vegetarian, waycest100, waycestislove, weasleycest, weheartquotes, whatever_stuff, wrongworddammit, wtf27, wtf_omgz, xgeliophobiax, xwhysoseriousx, yahoo_lulz, zombie_tparty
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